I’ve been nominated as hooker for the Crooked Timber First (and only) XV .
So far my suggestions that we switch to Australian/Gaelic rules, consistent with the most prominent ethnicities in the group have been ignored, but I’m still hoping to be rover. But until that happens, I need some suggestions. With ten years as a columnist and two as a blogger behind me, I’m naturally familiar with the squirrel grip. But presumably there’s more to the position than that. Can anyone give me any advice?
5 thoughts on “Happy hooker ?”
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John Quiggin 
So where did we get the phrase? I am sure it has been around for a long time.
Serious questions have been already raised about this highly suss selection over at Back Pages
“I’m naturally familiar with the squirrel grip. But presumably there’s more to the position than that. Can anyone give me any advice?”
To one ignorant of sporting terminology like myself, reading this combined with the title suggests that you are really opening yourself up to …
On a rugby pitch, a hooker can usually be relied on to be one of the most vicious hard-nosed players on the team.
The older they are, the more nasty tricks they know: an old-timer once told me that he used to put a bit of “Deep Heat” on the shoulders of his jersey, to give the opposition front-row something to think about during a scrum …
Perhaps the greatest hooker of recent times has been Keith Wood of Ireland (picture available here).
If only we could combine Woody with PrQ, we would end up with a bloke of normal hairiness!
Try the good old ‘Liverpool Kiss’. When in a scrum swing your head up very fast and try to catch your fellow hooker in the bridge of the nose. Very nast stuff, but you asked.